The Myth of the Young Violent Crazy Housing-Resistant Hollywood Hobo Strikes Again as Central Hollywood Coalition BID-Boardies Brian Folb and Carol Massie Misunderstand Pretty Much Everything about the City’s New Comprehensive Homeless Strategy

 Foul whisperings are abroad. Unnatural deeds  Do breed unnatural troubles; infected minds To their deaf pillows will discharge their secrets. More needs she the divine than the physician. God, God, forgive us all!
Foul whisperings are abroad. Unnatural deeds
Do breed unnatural troubles; infected minds
To their deaf pillows will discharge their secrets.
More needs she the divine than the physician.
God, God, forgive us all!

It never occurred to us—Carol Massie, Lady Macbeth…hmmm…

Watch, listen, and learn as Central Hollywood Coalition BID-Boardies Brian Folb and Carol Massie misunderstand everything about everything about homelessness in Los Angeles. We suppose that one of the big drawbacks to being a zillionaire is that you end up thinking you’re the sun and the rest of the world orbits around you and then you expose your delusions in public, maybe even on camera, and then you get mocked (to witness which, if you’re wondering, is why you’ve all been summoned here today!)

As anyone who’s awake in this city knows, the City of LA is considering a comprehensive strategy for dealing with homelessness. At Tuesday’s CHC Board of Directors meeting, the incomparably executive directrix Kerry Morrison, in her inimitably Board-by-the-nose-leading manner, told the Board of Directors that what they wanted to do about that right now was precisely nothing, and she’d get back to them next month to let them know if they wanted to do anything later. She also passed around a letter from the Fashion District as an example (although, in keeping with the zillionaire elite’s weirdly commie ethic with respect to the content of their public comments, the whole thing is essentially plagiarized from Carol Schatz’s letter on behalf of the Central City Association; why these people aren’t ashamed to show their faces in public we are never gone understand…) You can read a transcription after the break along with what we humbly hope are some entertaining observations.

Kerry Morrison: I think what I’d like to recommend is if there is still a need to somehow communicate next month on any aspect of the strategy, [unintelligible] specific recommendation to the Board, but I’m not prepared to tell you exactly what we would say right now.
We haven’t had the time to write on this phenomenon at length, but see how Kerry phrases everything as if the Board’s in charge, when actually she’s completely 110% totally in charge? Very artful, Ms. Morrison! “…not prepared to tell you exactly what we would say right now” indeed.

Brian Folb, BID Board member, feverishly imagining that the City's new homeless strategy is, like all things, meant to please him and him alone.
Brian Folb, BID Board member, feverishly imagining that the City’s new homeless strategy is, like all things, meant to please him and him alone.

Brian Folb: I’d just like to reiterate what I suggested at the last meeting. I’d like to see a focus on the most dangerous individuals. The ones that have actually been involved in assaults, multiple assaults, in the community, to take action on dealing with those individuals first, as a priority anyway.
Now, Brian Folb, get with the program. This particular homeless strategy is, for once, not about how many ways short of just killing them the City of LA can torment homeless people because they’re inconvenient for the zillionaire elite of Los Angeles. Right now we’re pretending that we want to help them not die so that the feds don’t cut off the funding. So, really… SHHH!!! Also, if there really are homeless killers roaming the streets anywhere outside the fevered imagination of Brian Folb, why don’t you call the fricking cops on them? We don’t need a strategy to lock up serial assaulters, we already have one. It’s the entire freaking criminal justice system. Oh, right, we forgot. In your mind, in the minds of your people, literal murder was literally legalized by Proposition 47, so locking them up is literally not an option any more, thanks to bleeding heart liberals and the goddamned ACLU. Sigh…

Carol Massie: You know, too, I think, one of the issues, one of the things I didn’t hear in the proposal today, and this is [unintelligible] anything about mental health, um…doing, well, it [unintelligible] outreach, but it was to help them, everybody, get housing. And as we know, the young people that are homeless, in great part don’t wanna be housed. So they’re doing four … … billion dollars, and it’s … just, we wanna have housing, we wanna do all this stuff, but it’s just not addressing having the, the, um, physician’s part of that piece, which I think is so much more important. You really need to find out who is not going [unintelligible] to put people in a house that can barely even keep themselves alive because they’re……crazy…
Ah, the myth of the crazy young hobos that wouldn’t be housed. Carol, who does your research for you? Oh yes, it is your herd of armed minions, the BID Patrol, with fanciful interpretative stylings by self-proclaimed social scientist Kerry Morrison. Listen, Carol, not that you care, but it’s obvious to everyone that you guys are just making stuff up because it suits your agenda. Even if you think you’re not just spinning wishful delusions into threadbare talking points, you might consider that that’s what you look like you’re doing to EVERYONE. Maybe, we don’t know… maybe… hire a professional? Pray for your immortal soul? Something. You’re embarrassing everyone except maybe yourself at this point, OK?

Transcription of the whole damned thing:

Fabio Conti: And then we have this, uh, we’re gonna review the L.A. City’s comprehensive homeless strategy.

Kerry Morrison: Yeah, I’m, um, I’m really not ready to recommend a response, again, I’ve been gone for two weeks, and I apologize for that. Today, actually, the City Council held a hearing on, I think we talked about this at the last board meeting. The City has come up with a big strategy, and the County has come up with a strategy. A lot of it does “interweave.” The question was whether or not we wanted to submit a letter on behalf of the BID supporting or, any part of that strategy. I just included a copy of the Fashion District’s letter as an example. But, I’m, I think what I’d like to recommend is if there is still a need to somehow communicate next month on any aspect of the strategy, [unintelligible] specific recommendation to the Board, but I’m not prepared to tell you exactly what we would say right now.

Brian Folb: I’d just like to reiterate what I suggested at the last meeting. I’d like to see a focus on the most dangerous individuals. The ones that have actually been involved in assaults, multiple assaults, in the community, to take action on dealing with those individuals first, as a priority anyway.

Carol Massie: You know, too, I think, one of the issues, one of the things I didn’t hear in the proposal today, and this is [unintelligible] anything about mental health, um…

Unidentified Interlocutor: Outreach?

Carol Massie: …doing, well, it [unintelligible] outreach, but it was to help them, everybody, get housing. And as we know, the young people that are homeless, in great part don’t wanna be housed. So they’re doing four … … billion dollars, and it’s … just, we wanna have housing, we wanna do all this stuff, but it’s just not addressing having the, the, um, physician’s part of that piece, which I think is so much more important. You really need to find out who is not going [unintelligible] to put people in a house that can barely even keep themselves alive because they’re…

KM: Without the supportive services…

CM: …crazy…and none of that was in the proposals…

KM: Yeah, and that’s where the County is kinda responsible for all of the mental health and the supportive services side of the homeless equation…

CM: …but they’re clearly not [unintelligible]

KM: Right, so that’s why I’m not, like, nothing we’re gonna say right now is gonna change the direction of this, but what’s gonna be interesting is in the next thirty days, to see if there’s any pieces of this that need additional advocacy or fallout in the conversation, um, and then maybe we can weigh in. But you’re right. I think it is inadequate on the mental health, um, component as well, which we definitely see, pretty huge impact of that in Hollywood. All right, I’ll keep you posted.


Image of Carol Massie and Fabio Conti playing at ear-nibbles is ©2016 MichaelKohlhaas.org. Image of Brian Folb is a public record, as we got it from the BID Board web page.

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